The Sexual Abuser You Know, and Yes You Know One

In our world this week, all eyes have been on Penn State University. It has been difficult, with horrific revelations evolving over time. I have always held in high esteem the head football coach, Joe Paterno, who has been a coach at Penn State longer than I’ve been alive.

To sum up the problem in as delicate a manner as possible, Jerry Sandusky, a major football coach, has been accused of sexually abusing many young boys over the years while the leadership of Penn State did nothing to report the abuse and actively sought to cover it up.  This same coach left Penn State to become a volunteer coach on a high school level, continuing to abuse boys, and began a charity for at-risk boys where he preyed on them there. The Penn State Grand Jury report contains details I will not chronicle here.

Why speak of it here? First, evil must be exposed and spoken against no matter the embarrassment. Second, this problem is not isolated to any class, group or segment of society. It is as prevalent in churches, schools and families as it is the dark back alleys or far off countries.  We have all heard the reports coming from victims of the Roman Catholic priesthood, but the reality is, it is as common in churches of Christ, Baptist churches and every other group you can name.

I speak with people every week who are still dealing with the ramifications of their own abuse years after it has ended.  Abuser and those abused cross every ethnic line, every income group and every social class, from church elders and ministers to the atheist.

These abusers seek out places they can hide under the guise of being reputable.  They work in school settings, churches, Bible camps, and the scouts. They go to church, synagogue, and the family Thanksgiving dinners. They don’t just attend these functions but they may hold the most prestigious and influential offices there. No place exists where they cannot be found.

What are we to do? We do the same thing we do with any sin or criminal activity. We expose it, deal with it legally, and pray for the spiritual restoration of all involved. We do not attempt to cover up, hide, ignore or deny its existence for any reason.

Sexual predators continue because they prey on the weak and vulnerable. They seek to silence the voice of those who have no options, isolating them from others, and taking every advantage of them through the power and position the predator holds. That position might be uncle or aunt, parent or step-parent, preacher or Bible class teacher, camp director or coach.

Under the guise of that place of trust, they prey on the vulnerable. Pure and undefiled religion has, as one of its components, the requirement to remember the fatherless (those without a safety net) and to keep oneself unstained by the world.

It is a bigger task than we thought it was.

 

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About Checking The Mail

I am Carl Feril, a minister and Licensed Clinical Marriage and Family Therapist. I am married to Janet, who is far better than I deserve, and have two wonderful sons. CW is living in Waterloo, KS and is married to Kelly through whom I have 4 step-grandsons and 7 great-grandkids. Orrin lives here in St John and is married to Meagan, and they have one child, Jayce. God has blessed me beyond measure and I hope to share all those blessings with others.
This entry was posted in Discipleship, Lessons I'm Learning, Minister Helps, Teens. Bookmark the permalink.

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